Your Creative Spark

We are all creative, in one way or another.  You may not think of yourself as an artist, but perhaps you like to cook, love gardening or tinkering with cars.  Maybe you’ve always been a doodler or love knowing how things fit together.  Each of us has the ability and desire to create something of our own as a reflection of our own uniqueness in the world.

So why are some people able to let this aspect of their personality shine while others cannot access their creative spark?  There may be many answers to this question, but in this fast-paced, information-laden society of ours, there is little time to simply be and allow our minds to wander.  Day-dreaming is a lost state of being and is often a preamble to creativity.  Our minds and souls, for that matter, need unstructured time to wander, do loop-de-loops and make free associations.  We need time to play, experiment, see what gives us joy.  How many of us learned a hobby or art from our grandparents, who had interests of their own and time to spend with us?  My grandmother sewed beautiful embroidery, and I learned needlepoint by the age of 10. 

Perhaps you were one of those people in touch with some interest or artistic bent at an earlier age, but gave it up because you now don’t have the time. Our natural inclinations are often what give us our greatest joy. On the other hand, you may feel you don’t have a creative bone in your body.  That’s okay.  Just by giving yourself this time you may get in touch with something that has lain dormant. With all the responsibilities and “have-to’s” in our lives, it’s important to keep those interests alive and woven through our days and weeks. It may seem strange that many people actually “schedule” this time for themselves in their calendars, but doing so gives them the space and often the permission to let go.

I know if I go too long without some “down time” I become stressed and irritable.  I don’t sleep as well and wake in the middle of the night making lists of things I have to do.  I am clearly overscheduled.  For a week or two, a relatively short period of time, this is manageable, but if it goes beyond that, I know I need to change something.  Ironically, the Universe is often right there; appointments are cancelled or rescheduled and I am given that much-needed breathing room.

Space.  Time.  It can feel so elusive and yet our souls need it. Unstructured and without agenda, time to nourish that part of us that is deep and timeless.  This is the part of ourselves we need to acknowledge if we are to be content and balanced in our lives and in this world.

Detours of Our Lives

Many of us have ideas of what our life will be like.  We’ll fall in love with this type of person, find a place to live (a certain neighborhood, a particular house, the “right” apartment), work to attain a certain job.  Our goals and dreams are often realized, and we can feel pretty good about things.

During the past week, I heard or came across many stories of people whose lives had presented something totally unexpected, and not in a good way: a child with disabilities, a lost job, the loss of a home, an accident.  For these people, their life was suddenly off-course; it veered in a direction they had not anticipated.

What does one do?  There is the initial shock and then “Why me?”  As we come to accept things as they are, we have some options.  If we can get past regret for what has happened, and if don't allow the fear of the future to swallow us whole, then what we have is today. Things are the way they are. In each moment, we can choose how to react and behave.  If we have children, we can be a role model, or instead transmit all our fears, disappointment and anger to them.

A devastating loss may require we seek professional help to deal with the situation.  Many people suffering the loss of a loved one, which is a natural life passage, often see a therapist or grief counselor because they feel unable to move on. 

However, with each of these people telling their stories, something amazing happened. Each and every one about whom I read felt that the unexpected change in their life brought out some strength they didn't know they had and ultimately made them a better human being.  That’s not to say life was easy or they didn’t have sleepless nights or have to work hard to get their lives into a more manageable place. Yet in living the experience, they were able to get beyond feeling like a victim and find some learning, some new understanding that affected their life view.

We may need help in tough situations.  We’ll likely need time to figure out how to cope with a new reality.  The question is whether we can come through not embittered and having found some glimmer of gratitude for where we are now.

What's It All About?

You can see that everyday spirituality does not result in a post every day--or even every week--or month!  So what is it all about?

If we accept that we are spiritual beings in a physical body (I realize that's a big "if" for a lot of people), then connecting to our spirituality is pretty important if we want to live the most happiest, most fulfilling and contented life.

The posts in this blog have illustrated times when I've felt spiritual or connected to that deep place inside of me.  Or they address topics about how we can be our best selves.

But the thing that's most difficult is how we make these connected times more and more part of our everyday lives.  So that's what I'm going to write about for awhile.

It's all about being conscious, about waking up to what is really going on in our lives and within ourselves.  Once you wake up, there's no going back.  And don't think you don't know that on a deeply intuitive level. In fact, many people run the other way by being so busy, altering their consciousness through drugs or alcohol, or living their lives in the past (regret) or the future (worry) that there is no room to be conscious about their lives today.  Right NOW.  No way they want to go there.

When we do go there, the payoff is BIG. No, it's way more than that.  But it does take courage and being honest with ourselves.  Opting to look in the mirror and see ourselves, warts and all, can be the decision of a lifetime.  No masks.  Nothing to take away the pain.  Just YOU.  It changes the way you see yourself, the world around you, other people.  Accepting yourself for who you are makes living in this sometimes crazy, mixed-up world a whole lot better.  Nothing is beyond your reach, not even happiness.

My Present

The beach is strewn
With a thousand
Shells, rocks, sticks, fossils.
Each has a story to tell
Of how it came to be
Here.

Every day something new
Speaks to me.
Though seemingly random,
There is a timeless march
Of water, sea and sand.

A gull swoops down for breakfast.
Waves slosh against rocks and shore.
Pulling back to leave their
Cross hatch vestiges
Which perplex me.

It is here
Day after day
Time immemorial
My present.

Run!

This morning my body said "run!"
I've been a relative deadbeat,
Laziness and a cold my excuses.
Down in the relative warmth
Of a different clime,
My body naturally responds
After a long, dreary winter.
Open up!  Let me out!
Like an untethered horse
Falling into a comfortable trot,
I can do over a mile
There's life in this mid-aged girl yet!

New Moon

I remember years ago
Upon waking, the thought
Of sitting still,
In a chair,
Listening to my breath,
"Tuning in" to my body
Was as far away
And impossible
As the moon.

A far off destination.
Through intention, practice and purpose
The moon has become my home.
Like its waxing and waning.
Cloudy or clear,
Full or smaller aspects of itself.
I listen to my body,
Everyday a little different
Showing me the way.

In the Moment of Waves

We all know that primordial sound of waves on the shore.  The ebb and flow, the never-ending cycles of time, of life.  A metaphor for the womb, for give and take, for life's struggles.

If you were to travel around the world experiencing waves lapping at different shores, would they sound the same?  Or would each have its own unique rhythm on a calm and sunny day? 

A wave crashing on the shore has many different components.  It furls close to shore, and at its loudest, crescendos onto land, where it quiets and then fizzes bubbles for several seconds before receding.  With every ebb and flow, the sea leaves its white latticework in the shallows, which never fully disappears but reforms with the next wave.  Every now and then there will be just a moment of silence, like the space between an in-breath and out-breath.  No two waves are ever the same.

Hearing the waves is a comfort, the sounds recurring over and over. The water brings an energy with it, an encouragement or perhaps an urgency.  There can be tenderness, with several waves merely lapping; lest I become too complacent the next may crash, sending water over my ankles and up to my knees.  The next minute the water, clear and unspoiled, feels like velvet on my feet.

I've been mystified by the crosshatch design left on the sand by the retreating waves.  I cannot understand why it appears that way all along the beach.  The air has a faintly briny smell which is only perceptible when the wind pauses.

Around the rocks is a grand slithering as smaller rocks and pebbles are pulled back with a mighty drag.  And there's a tucking in around the rocks in the gentler ebbs, where the slithering turns into a soft gurgle.  Hearing all the sounds together is a symphony, one that is made up as it goes along.  Sounds I love always and never tire of.

Infinite Possibilities

I was fortunate to get away for a week to an island with a beautiful beach. 

Amid a smooth stretch of beach
Leading me down the aisle
I espied a love object
Beckoning my gaze.

A fossilized rock of sea creatures
No bigger than a deck of cards
With indentations for my fingers
Like a bowling ball.

It begged me to pick it up
Its meaning was clearly
To focus my attention
And glean its wisdom.

A cross between a fish and turtle
Perforated with circles and holes
Some dimples, others craters
One through which I see the whole world.

Containing vestiges of shells
The homes of sea creatures long gone
When I turn it over
There's a hippopotamus!

Living Well Into the Future (Part 2)

What does it mean to live and age well?  As a follow-up to the last post, which talks primarily about our physical environment, how it impacts us, and what we can do about it, this post talks about how living well is determined by our personal philosophies and preferences, and the choices we make each and every day.

We know that to have a strong mind and body we need to take our health and well-being into our own hands. This means eating healthy, well-prepared food and exercising regularly.  To maintain our social and psychological well-being, we need friends and to be involved in activities and causes.  Some of these are a continuation of what we’ve known and done for years, but we also want to be open to meeting new people and learning about new topics.  From a financial perspective, as our life situations change, we want to make sure we are not living beyond our means, and have put away a little something for the future.

Yet, once we have attended to our most basic needs, the question of aging well may be a very personal one.

Does it mean:

Having good health?
Maintaining relationships with those we love?

Traveling the world and seeing all those places we’ve dreamed of?

Living life by our own rules without any “shoulds?”

Being able to give freely of ourselves and our wisdom?

Enjoying dinners out or the arts regularly?

You may be thinking at this point of the proverbial “bucket list,” but aging well has less to do with what we want to accomplish as we get older, and more about how we want to BE and interact in the world. 

One way to think about this is to imagine what you would like said about you in a eulogy or written on your tombstone.  How would you like to be remembered?  What will be a personal disappointment if you don't accomplish it during this lifetime?  Or, to be even more dramatic, if you had six months to live, how would you like to spend them? What makes you excited to get up in the morning?  These are just some of the questions you may ask yourself as you think about what "living well" means to you.  There's no better time.

Living Well Into the Future (Part I)

Many articles today talk about how we can remain active and healthy into old age.  They cite maintaining social relationships, keeping physically fit and engaging our minds. Many older adults today still work—either part-time or full-time--or volunteer their time to noteworthy institutions and causes.  Diet and nutrition is also important.  And yet, from a physical perspective, as our world has become more crowded with technology, people and information; as our food comes from further away, often in cans and boxes, with labels that are often misleading; as our air and water are often polluted with toxins—how do we keep healthy as we age and what does this mean for each of us?

For many of the baby boomer generation, the government could be relied on to provide a safety net in a variety of ways.  The FDA had vigorous standards to help protect us from harmful medications.  Safety inspections were routinely carried out on our poultry and livestock before it was brought to market.  The EPA made sure we had clean air and water. The SEC was formed to protect investors against ill-contrived schemes and imprudence by individuals as well as banks and large firms. The government still provides a medical and financial safety net through Medicare and social security, but we know these will undergo changes in the coming years. 

Like many other posts in this blog, a big part of living and aging well is being aware, open and conscious and taking responsibility for ourselves.   We often know the best way to ______  (fill in the blank), but we don’t do it.  Do you reach for unhealthy foods to comfort yourself?  Have you had a medical issue you’ve tried to ignore?  Are you under constant stress at work?  Sometimes these situations are out of our control, but much of the time we can make different decisions about our jobs, our time, who we choose to be with, where we live, what we eat and what we choose to believe. 

For example, are you surrounded by people who are negative, complaining, and bring you down?  Being aware of how some people sap our energy while others make us feel joyful and engaged is a first step to determining whether we want these people in our social system.  If we really don’t but have little choice, we might be able to minimize the amount of time we spend with them, or include others whose company we enjoy during the next visit.

Aging well doesn't start at age 65 or 70.  It's part of the lifestyle we've created through our lives, and yet it can be changed at any time.  There are always the "big" issues, from the way our food is processed to the air we breathe.  But we can decide if we live near a coal plant or eat fast food on a regular basis.  Dealing with issues as they arise, taking an active role for our own well-being and educating ourselves about important topics will help us create a life we enjoy living today and "well" into the future.